Monday, January 16, 2012
Where is My Monday Motivation?
I was debating on whether or not to write this post, but I've shared the good and now the worst experience of my life, so I figure I should share this one too!
My nightmare from Hell continues, this: http://www.ascendingbutterfly.com/2012/01/open-letter-to-new-presbyterian.html has now cost me a job too.
The night I landed in the Emergency Room was a night I should have been celebrating, after years of searching not just for a job, but for THE job, I landed it and had over-lapped with the person leaving the role that afternoon. That day of my nightmare started off as the best day ever, on the brink of a new year, with a brand new job I was super excited for, and ended in the E.R. and me spending just under two weeks in the hospital. With me toasting in my new year with Gingerale sick to my stomach on pain meds and more alone than I had ever felt in my entire life.
I used the new job to keep me motivated when things got dark, I kept thinking, one more test, one more day and the quicker I could get past it all the closer I would be to starting my great new job.
Well I got a call today telling me I have no new job to go to. That while I was in the hospital their bottom line was suffering and they could not wait me out. (And I’m thinking how their bottom line was suffering was a particularly insensitive choice of words, technically the one SUFFERING was ME!)
But that’s reality. When life steam rolls you and your world comes to a stop, whether it’s your own illness or the death of a loved one, you find out quite painfully that the world continues to go on, it’s only YOUR world that stops. A cruel blow indeed, but that’s very much life. Corporate America cares only for itself.
So here I am. Grateful to be here after being on the brink of death. Don’t get me wrong, with all the insanity I went through I realize what is important here is that I am still here to tell the tale, but I feel cheated and quite angry.
I’d ask what more 2012 would like to rob me off? But I honestly don’t want the answer to that question.
So where is the Monday Motivation you ask? Take my setback as an example to be grateful and live each moment like it’s the last, because you have no idea when it very well could be.
Yesterday I ate my first meal made by own hands since 2011 and I can tell you it tasted better than any other meal I had made before. I enjoyed it more and savored each flavor. Just because I COULD make it for myself, made it that much better. Sometimes cooking can get tedious, but it’s when you can no longer do something that you realize just how much it means to you.
My kitchen, a small humble one, became a working meditation for me as I prepared a meal for myself with my own hands.
Todays Challenge: REJOICE IN THE LITTLE THINGS – They are NOT as little as you may think.
I am back at square one in my life today on many levels, but I refuse to let it defeat me!
˙·٠•●♥ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥●•●•٠·˙˙·٠•●♥ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥●•●•٠·˙˙·٠•●♥ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥●•●•٠·˙