I know you are probably thinking that's a weird title for our weekly moment of gratitude, but this week's post is more about lessons learned and putting my foot down, it's about schooling others on what I will and won't accept. This isn't my flowery list about happy moments during the week. So if you were hoping for a list of inspiring sunrises, awesome sunsets and hugs, today isn't it. (I give you the chance to run and come back tomorrow if you wish). I do hope that some of these will resonate with you.
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| Beware of the Spiritual Vampires in your life! |
(A)
I have CHANGED - I don't know if it's my latest near death experience, the wisdom that comes with age and experience, or a fair mixture of both, but I have less patience and tolerance for 'Spiritual Vampires' lately. I am clearing my personal and professional life of those who want something from me for nothing. Those who just the act of speaking to leave me deflated, un-happy, sad and emotionally drained.
Here are a list of NO's! for this week:
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ - NO! - I am not interested in 'hopping on a call' and giving you free social media consulting. I don't want to tell you how to run your event, conference or summit, you are getting paid to do it, and if you want my time you will do the same. Why do people think calling it 'bending my ear' or 'picking my brain' entitles them to free social media consulting? There is a reason that since the moment I started blogging, I made it very hard to find my number on purpose. It helps weed out those seeking the benefits of Social Media Management that they don't want to pay for.
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ - NO! - You go first, stop sending me requests to "Like" your page. When I notice someone has liked my page I go do the same automatically. So sending me a request to go like your page when you haven't yet done the same doesn't work for me. Again, I am back to quid pro quo. Stop asking me for things you yourself aren't willing to do.
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ - NO! - Me offering to share event photos, does NOT give you carte blanche to actually go ahead and remove my watermark and pass my photo off as your own. That's stealing! And don't you just love how the ones that do it, get super enraged when it's done to them?
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ - NO! - I will not post your infographic or give your upcoming event 'pre-coverage'. Let's all drop the pretense, stop playing games and call a spade a spade, 'pre-coverage' is ADVERTISING. If you want to advertise, then you will PAY for it. Don't send me a snippy email telling me your infographic is of benefit to my readers. And please stop being dense and telling me I should pay YOU for the work you have put into the infographic and that you are doing ME the favor of not charging me for it. I DON'T WANT IT so don't send it to me and don't expect me to post your infographic, widget or rafflecopter contest for free. No one goes into blogging or any other form of digital media to become a 'free calendar of events' or a free contest notification site, that is certainly not my prime editorial content. Nor is the contest on a website that I am not personally hosting. This is a Lifestyle Blog, not a calendar of events blog, not a post about every contest on the planet blog or a place for you to come for free advertising.
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ - NO! - Don't sign me up for your newsletter just because you have access to my email address! If I want your emails I will sign up for them on my own. I don't sign you up automatically for mine, so please do not send me yours. Handing you my card does not give you the right to add me to a newsletter.
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ - NO! - I am NOT required to give any event, fundraiser or Not-For-Profit free coverage or 'pre-coverage' either. I do have charities I am passionate about, but at the end of the day I can't pay my ISP (or any other bill for that matter) with anyone's good intentions, and that includes my own. Your employer doesn't pay you in gum, swag or good intentions and I prefer not to be paid for my time that way either.
So how is (A) something that goes into a gratitude post? Does it sound like a rant instead of a gratitude post? Perhaps to others it might be perceived that way, but as for me I am grateful for the new me that is emerging, a lot about me has changed throughout the past two years, and I am placing a lot more value on my time. And in this case, I do expect the Universe (and those trying to circle my orbit), to rise up to meet ME. There is a reason that the expression 'You can't get blood from a stone' still exists. It's sad that 'nice' is still perceived as stupid.
It still amazes me that a woman who knows exactly what she will and won't accept can still be insulted and offended by others for knowing not only her own mind, but setting the terms by which she will do business. I keep emphasizing that relationships are a two way street. Because when there is all take and no give, it's not a two way street anymore, it's a collision course and that gets both parties no where.
(B) You don't have a budget - I don't have the 'free' time, let's call it an impasse and walk away from the table with civility instead of hostility. I am grateful to have reached a point in my life where I don't have any trouble about being clear about where I stand personally or professionally.
(C)
Hello September! - The first day of a new month really does always fill me with possibility, so
I greet September knowing that I expect the best possible outcome in all of my endeavors, and invite you all to do the same. Approach this month like you did as a child going back to school sitting at a desk with a brand new clean notebook in front of you. Soak it all up like a sponge (and much like sponge, you can always squeeze out the excess water if it's weighing you down!)
˙·٠•●♥ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥●•●•٠·˙˙·٠•●♥ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥●•●•٠·˙˙·٠•●♥ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥●•●•٠·˙
We have a winner!
Join me in wishing
Congrats to Kathy P. who won our $100 In Bloom By Jonquil Shopping Spree! Kathy's entry was #716!
Just a reminder, some entries were deleted before the rafflecopter draw because they were not following the main entry instructions! Please do the main entry BEFORE doing any other entry so you don't skip the most important step.
Stay tuned more great giveaways coming soon!
˙·٠•●♥ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥●•●•٠·˙˙·٠•●♥ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥●•●•٠·˙˙·٠•●♥ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥●•●•٠·˙
My Take:
There are brands and PR reps that do get it, and there are bloggers out there that actually ASK before 'borrowing' your photos, and for those people in my life who do show me the appreciation, gratitude and respect I deserve I am grateful for you all beyond measure!
Whether my list of NO!'s sit with you as a list of pet peeves, a meme, a rant or just insights into what drives THIS particular blogger nuts, I'm sure a few of them resonated with you, and I'm sure some of you have your own to add, so please feel free to let me know which resonated with you or which didn't and why, or add some of your own! Don't get me wrong, despite an inbox filled with PR fails and requests for my work and time for free, there is much that I am grateful for this week. Just remember one rule to relationships that never fails, don't expect of others what you are un-willing or un-able to offer or provide yourself. QUID PRO QUO my friends, QUID PRO QUO!
I am grateful for all the negative experiences and abrasive people who rubbed me the wrong way this year, it helped me to appreciate the ones that don't even more.
What are you GRATEFUL for this week Butterfly? Is it a lesson learned, or a random act of kindness that you gave or received?
˙·٠•●♥ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥●•●•٠·˙˙·٠•●♥ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥●•●•٠·˙˙·٠•●♥ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥●•●•٠·˙
FTC Disclosure: This is NOT a sponsored post. Few people want to pay for the truth.
